Harry: “I don’t remember that.”
Draco: “That’s because I made it up.
There was no flight, however slight.
You just… dropped, ass that you are.”

a bird will plummet headlong towards the earth then,
at the last second, lift from its kamikaze dive
and wrest clear into the open sky

its so much more comforting in the solace of your own home, spinning rounds and pewpewing instead of recognising the reality of unfortunate truths

it is gratifying to live in the realms of optimism, until you realise you’re not actually living in it

suddenly im overwhelmed by this same feeling, something i can’t explain, not even to myself. everything’s a blank and a whirl at the same time, it’s like i’m paralysed in spirit and mind. perhaps, as i believe, i’m simply feeling weak.

many times i’ve believed myself to be powerhungry, not manifested but an implicit trait affecting my thoughts and feelings. or perhaps it’s something inherent in human nature, much like greed. not surprising, considering the supremacy of humans in the world we have crafted and are crafting.

but, i think, when i feel weak i dont feel weak, perhaps because of my stubbornness and delusions im on automatic shutdown, shutting everyone out, including myself.

but sometimes being weak is beautiful

i look back at myself and laugh

life’s changing as always

a

i wonder how much i’ve changed

they say time heals all wounds but they are wrong, time is but an anaesthetic, numbing you from the pain, with the pain itself. and the scars remain, the scars which you can hide from anyone but yourself, and those who made them. these scars define you, not by choice but by fate.

i’m sorry, for you, for me, i wish i did not but i did, and perhaps, as you said, i was insensitive. i was young and foolish, too full of myself.

these scars define me, i should move on, at least try to. but it pains me. i seek not your forgiveness, but that of my own.

it’s time to move on. i will. i hope.

Thats why I slipped out the back before you knew I was there
I know you felt unprepared
But every single time I was around I just bring you down
And I could tell that it was time to be scared
Thats why I slipped out the back before you knew I was there
And I know the way I left wasn’t fair
I didn’t want to be around just to bring you down
I’m not a hero but don’t think I didn’t care